The degree to which our mindset influences our lives, the way in which we handle and accept the bad times, and allow ourselves to enjoy our lives, can never be underestimated. Most of us know somebody who seems to have it all and yet, never seems content and someone else who has little but possesses an unshakeable love for life that allows them to make the most of what they have. In writing that I don’t mean to be overly critical of the former. We never know what baggage a person carries with them and some people’s genetic make up is more predisposed to negative thoughts than others; however, what is certain is that all of us can work on our mental health, as on any other part of our lives, to improve our sense of wellbeing, confidence and our way of approaching the challenges that come our way.
Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not. Nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not. Unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not. The world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. – Calvin Coolidge President of the United States of America from 1923 until 1929.
This famous quote from Calvin Coolidge summarises the vital role that persistence and endeavour play in helping us to realise our dreams. When we look at the world and remember those who really changed it: Nelson Mandela; Martin Luther King; Gandhi, synonymous with each of them is their complete dedication to the cause and their ability to endure terrible conditions in pursuit of their goals. Hopefully, in our own way, we can draw inspiration from such figures to help us overcome the trials that life throws at us and keep going when keeping going is at its most difficult.
We have all heard inspiring stories about very successful people who have failed many times before going onto success. Thomas Edison famously remarked that on his journey to inventing the light bulb rather than having failed 10,000 times he had discovered 10,000 ways in which the light bulb didn’t work therefore bringing him ever closer to his goal.
One of the greatest mental shifts you can make is to view failure not as sign of your lack of competence or as a reflection of who you are but instead as a stage on your journey to success. If you are afraid to fail it means you will instead avoid the possibility by never trying and as the old adage goes, ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained.’
Sometimes the greatest act of resistance is that of simply taking the next step towards your destination. Completing the next task, making the next call. At times big dreams and subjective notions such as success and victory can seem insurmountable; however, what is achievable is the next small task in front of your nose. So do what you can now. Passionately pursue what is in front of you. Complete it and move on to the next. “A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step”.
How many good ideas have been left on a bar room floor? Okay, maybe some of them were terrible ideas but hear me out. How many great business ideas are never acted on? You get were I am going with this right? Without action all the ideas in the world are meaningless.
Throughout life you will meet people with brilliant ideas who never act upon them and, it’s a shame. Try to develop a habit of taking action within yourself. If someone asks you to send them something; do it straight away. If you need to carry out some mundane tasks that can be out off until tomorrow train yourself to do them today. Develop the habit of acting on your ideas.
The old latin saying ‘mens sana in corpore sano’, usually translated as ‘a healthy mind in a healthy body’, is as true today as it was in the days of the Roman Empire. We each have a duty to ourselves to look after the bodies we have been given and it’s widely documented that physical exercise is a huge factor in maintaining and improving our mental as well as our physical health.
Never before has the issue of mental health been so spoken about and never before have we had greater access to information about the topic and here’s the thing: nothing is more important than your mental health. Your family, your career and your physical health are all dependant on you nurturing and caring for your own mental wellbeing.
One thing I would like to say before I leave this topic is if you do feel you might benefit from speaking to someone about your mental health please do it. Reaching out for help is a pro-active sign of strength and intelligence.
Many people have more difficult lives than others and often we will never know the difficulties that those around us have had to overcome. However self pity is a vice that if left grow unchecked has the potential to destroy everything around us that is good and leave more space for itself to grow.
Life is not fair and for some it can be extremely difficult but adopting a victim mentality is a sure fire way of jeopardising our potential for future successes. So recognise self pity when it rears its head and kill it at source. You have too much to achieve and too much to look forward to to dwell on negative experiences from your past.
Psychologists break down people’s mental approach into two broad categories: fixed mindsets and growth mindsets, with individuals usually sharing a mixture of both approaches dependent on various factors such as the task at hand; their mental state at the time the task comes and how comfortable they feel in their environment.
A person with a fixed mindset believes that one’s success or failure in a task is largely dependent on the natural ability one has for the type of work involved. For example, a person with a fixed mindset might say, ‘I failed that exam because I am really bad at maths,’ without fully acknowledging that they hadn’t properly prepared for the exam. This then creates a convenient excuse for them not to try to study hard at maths anymore because to their way of thinking the problem lies in their lack of natural mathematical ability as opposed to their endeavour.
A person with a growth mindset believes more in the power of industry and application than natural ability. He/she sees natural ability as a mere starting point from which disadvantages can be minimised and advantages maximised through hard work and application. In contrast to the previous statement a person with a growth mindset might say, ‘I failed that exam therefore I really have to spend more time working on that subject to improve and pass my next exam.’
Furthermore, a fixed mindset can create an acute fear of failure in an individual because they are likely to view failure as a direct result of their innate abilities rather than as a perhaps necessary learning step on the road to success.
It’s a competitive world. Accepting this fact and embracing competition as a natural part of life helps us to meet challenges head on and perform at our best when the pressure is on. A positive perception of competition as a challenge which brings out the best in us helps us accept success and failure as normal parts of life. The possibility of either should not deter us from accepting and doing our best to succeed at the challenges which come our way.
We live in a constant state of change. The world around us is constantly evolving and changing. The seasons come and go as do the years and with them our lives and the new stages of them. Trying to hold onto the past and control every part of our lives so as to avoid moving on is a useless endeavour and can only lead to frustration and an inability to accept the now. Therefore, we must try to embrace change both positive and negative as being the natural state of our world and of our lives within it.
When we learn to embrace change we look forward to the future instead of harking after past days. We stay up to date with what is happening. We develop a curiosity for the latest ways of doing things and an acceptance of the environment we find ourselves in.
Written for CareerJunction by Mark Dempsey.
